This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
