Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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