Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
