I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
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