24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
