bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
