I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
