New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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