come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
