I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Randomize
