Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
