And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize