wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize