He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
