This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Randomize
