i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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