You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
