I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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