You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
