He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Redeem this text for a blowjob
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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