ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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