It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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