I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize