similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
