I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
