...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
