I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Let's paint friendship bongs
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
