I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize