Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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