I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
