I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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