Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
