I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Randomize
