why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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