Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
