I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
