Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
