just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
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