THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Randomize
