My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize