i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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