When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
there was a trapeze. enough said
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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