I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Randomize
