is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
