ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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