God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
