I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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