You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
