nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
