I like to think it a success when the cops are called
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
