Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
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