it was like his penis was on wheels.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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